Thursday, August 9, 2012

Plastic Surgery

When I logged onto Yahoo! this morning to check my email a news story about a 14 year old girl getting plastic surgery caught my eye. You can read the article by clicking here.

The story is actually really awesome in my opinion but maybe that's because it hits so close to home and I can relate to the girl so well. Apparently there is an organization called Little Baby Face Foundation that pays for kids with deformities to have the medical procedures they need. I think this is absolutely incredible because life as a kid/teenager is hard enough as it is to deal with.

I was a pretty cute kid in elementary school and I had a good amount of friends. Once I got to middle school however everything changed. Middle school was the worst for me and I feel like that's the case with a lot of people. It is such an awkward time in our lives when some of us are starting to go through puberty... mix that with a bunch of mean snotty kids that don't know enough social etiquette to not say terrible things to a persons face... and you've successfully landed in Hell on Earth.

Puberty was not kind to me at all. Puberty was a bitch. I got terrible cystic acne, my teeth were crooked so I had to get braces, my hair was frizzy and I had no idea how to use make up or a straightener, and my boobs had starting to develop so I got extremely self conscious of my body image compared to other girls. Top that off with learning how and where to shave and like an idiot shaving my arms, resulting in my arm hair growing in thicker, and the ultimate cherry on top of that was that according to my peers I had a big nose.

I was teased endlessly by some of the "mean girls" at my school and much like the girl in the video I would come home from school crying only I didn't make it a secret from either of my parents. I begged both of them for plastic surgery when I was in 6th grade! Obviously neither of them had the money nor did they think I needed plastic surgery. To parents, their kids are perfect and they could never see their child as ugly.

But my moms pep talks, bless her heart, just weren't cutting it anymore. My peers had made sure that I knew I was ugly. But what could I do? Not a whole lot at that time. I sucked it up and wore a hoodie to school every day (even in the 108 degree summers) to hit my body and arm hair. I dressed in all black and put black in my hair to show everyone "how much I didn't care" even though I obviously really did. And I saved up money for a long time. Every birthday and Christmas or any extra cash I got went in a lock box under my bed and I saved for years.

I grew into my looks a little bit in 8th grade and even more so in high school. My braces came off at the end of 7th grade and my acne cleared up when I went on birth control during the middle of 8th grade which is when I also discovered a straightener, yay! I had boyfriends and from my previous post y'all know I lost my virginity which had up and down effects on my self esteem.

Once I was in high school things got a little better. Most of my peers had learned social etiquette by this time and knew that it wasn't proper to insult and make fun of someone to their face... so they just did it behind my back. Which I, and I'm being completely serious here, appreciated so much more. It's less embarrassing when you don't have to hear them say it and watch other people laugh. So it wasn't much but it was an improvement.

After I graduated high school and finished my first year and a half of community college I had finally saved enough for plastic surgery... it was about a month after my 20th birthday. I shopped around for surgeons and narrowed it down between a few. Even though I had originally just wanted was rhinoplasty... plastic surgery is a slippery slope. The surgeons almost "sell" you on other procedures because they point out other flaws in your face... and do the whole "Oh but after we fix your nose then this flaw will really stand out so you should do this too...". After all was said and done I ended up getting a rhinoplasty, chin augmentation, and a brow lift.

Waking up after surgery was the most painful experience of my life. I felt like I had been run over a million times with a huge truck... and from the pictures I have of that day it looks like that's what happened.

The day all my casts came off from my face my mom was with me and when I looked in the mirror I started crying. My mom asked me what was wrong and I couldn't even take my eyes off the mirror when I replied "my face just looks so good". I'm a very emotionally person and I cry a lot over sad things that that day was the first and only time I have ever cried tears of happiness. I loved my results.

It took a while to get used to my new face and I know it weirded out certain family members and some of my friends really didn't agree with it. But it was the right choice for me. I am so much more confident and outgoing now than I ever was before.

But people need to be careful with plastic surgery. Like I said I absolutely love my results but now that those things are improved, when I look in the mirror all I can see are the other flaws. My boobs are too small, my thighs are too big, my eye brows don't perfectly match, I have acne scars, oh God are those laugh lines around my mouth?! And yes... my arms are still harry (but thankfully I'm blonde! haha). Once you fix something you notice something else and it's an endless cycle so I can see how people can get addicted and out of control. [See: Heidi Montag]

But even noticing my other flaws I've become more comfortable in my own skin. Just because I notice them doesn't mean they bother me as much. I don't think I'd have any more surgery until I'm more older and even then who knows. Right now I'm perfectly fine with myself and everyone else seems to be too, I think my new found confidence makes me that much sexier!

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